In October I noticed I was having more anxiety about the whole “going to the doctor” thing. I ended up calling the asthma specialist I’d been referred to at least six months previously and going in on Monday.
This was stressful in many ways. I’m freak-folks-the-hell-out fat. I’ve got the whole mental “You mean it’s asthma, not just that I’m fat and out of shape?” thing going. There’s getting through my first Thanksgiving without my father. There’s that fall is the most stressful time of year at work.
But I went. Some of it was new to me, such as being handed a tissue with a length of plastic wrap on top and being asked to blow my nose. (Ruled out infections.) Also a lung function test, where I breathed out, in, and out through a measuring device. As weight can factor into dosing of asthma meds, I did get on the nifty digital scale .. which displayed the ever-useful “ERR”. Oy. I did tell the nurse my weight, and she made no comment. Blood pressure was fine, both in terms of my specific measurement, and that the room I was in had the proper-sized cuff and the tech taking my blood pressure used the large cuff without me needing to request it. I met with the doc to discuss my history and current symptoms. We agreed to doing some skin tests to confirm and/or rule out current allergies. My biggest responses were to dust mites, grasses, and dog dander. Hence Operation de-Dust Mite, which included encasing our king-sized mattress in a “protector
” to keep the dust mites inside it.
Side note: wrestling a king-sized mattress into a giant zippered pillowcase? Hilarious. Ended up putting the mattress on its side, propped against the headboard, to get the thing on.
What struck me the most, though, was that the doctor did not blame anything on my weight. No question that exercise is an asthma trigger for me. Not “Are you sure you’re just not used to exercise?” Doc accepted that it’s a trigger, saying something like, “Smoke, exercise, going out in the cold, those are very common.” I half expected to hear “Exercise will help improve your lung capacity” but there was no mention of exercise or weight loss. Treatment plan added a few new meds to better control my asthma and reducing overall exposure to allergens, especially in our bedroom.
I’m glad it was a good experience. I am less thrilled that it was a surprise and not business as usual for me.
to help me be more consistently active — I use it as a pedometer that does built-in recordkeeping, so I can get a sense of how active I am in general, not just a single day. Since I got it I’ve found myself at work focusing deeply for one to two hours and then getting up to walk and get water or coffee or tea or something. I’d quit feeling guilty about it because I found that a brief break to walk and stretch lets me focus better afterward. 
